God is good!

Hi everyone. Thank you for all your support and love you all keep showing me. I have been a little busy writing my finals hence the short hiatus.It been hectic but I have enjoyed every bit of itand I cherish the experience I have had and the friends I have made.

There is light at the end of the tunnel and for this I am grateful to God.

To this end, here is my new look. Shout out to my niece Fatou Kargbo for hooking me up with this new look. I love it.  What do you all think?????????

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I love it!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Don’t forget to like or leave a comment.

Joys of Motherhood

img_5246My babies!!!!!

“(24/7) Once you sign up to be a mother, thats the only shift they offer”-Jodi Picoult My sister’s Keeper

 

One of my best achievements in life are my three beautiful kids. They are a blessing in my life and I would not trade  moments with them for anything else in this life.

I  would like to know if anyone out there relates to some of these things that happen to me as a mother. I am a student, work full time and a full time mum, living with my husband. I applaud single mothers, i don’t know how you all do it by yourselves because  even as a mother who shares responsibility with my husband, its a little bit tough. We cannot change the cards we are dealt, so I applaud all you wonderful single mums/dads out there, kudos to you,I take my hat out to you all.

I get off work, pick my boys up as my husband looks after them when am at work, and then drops them off to family members where I get to pick them up. They are both 1 and 3 respectively. When I pick them up from work, I am already so tired that my mind starts telling me “Hadie, you ve had a long day today so you need to get home and relax”. I will get home and hoping my babies will  let me be for maybe an hour. Hmmm, what a dream, because the moment I get home my life starts all over again. My 1 year old would be crying, am trying to take care of him, feed him, change him, then my 3 yr. old would start calling for my attention because in his little mind I guess he is saying i need my mummy too. And I would ask him what do you want? By this time I am thinking, do they not know that I need a little break? “I want juice now”! He does know how to get himself a drink, but for some reason mummy has to do it for him. I would keep my calm because I know he is trying to argue with me, going back and forth as at this age, he has just found his voice so he talks a lot more than before. I would say baby please ask nicely and without any prompt to “ask nicely” he would say with his little cute voice Mummy, Can I please have juice?” I say to myself he knows how to ask politely but why does he start with the command? He just likes it when mummy talks a lot.Oh well i can’t win every battle so i will let it go, get him a drink and think well this is it,he is going to watch a movie in his room. Nope! He comes back for different things every now and again.

Have you all noticed that for some reason when you are on the phone and your child notices this moment, he seems to ask for more things than usual as if he is trying to say “Get off the phone woman” This happens to me almost everyday of my life and i will tell him over and over again, “baby mummy is on the phone, but it just falls on deaf ears.  Its mummy this, mummy that,or  baby crying or fighting with his brother for his tablet.I end up not able to do one single homework or relaxing. By the time they fall asleep, I get too tired and am sleeping on the couch, till my husband gets home which is a little before midnight. Sometimes if they are not asleep at this time, he helps me out with them. I appreciate him for this because he would just be becoming off from work himself but i know he understands and i appreciate him for this.

My 3 yr old talks a lot but he makes me laugh a lot and i cherish these little banters between us. These are some of our conversations:

CJ: Mummy i need my pants please?

Mummy: No you are not wearing any pants today

CJ: Am mad at you mummy.

Mummy: Why baby, what did I do?

CJ: because  you said I can’t get my pants.  You are not being nice to me. . He is so funny.

He is also caring when he sees me cry over some TV show that am watching(am a soppy mum, cry for anything or everything on Tv-Dont’t judge😜),he would ask me mummy why are you crying?  Nothing baby the show is just making me cry. He would still say “Sorry mummy”!

Are these experiences an all mum experience, or is it just me? ‘Time for youself’ as a mother is a thing of the past and so now i just dream about it and cherish the moments i have with them. My friends tell me “You don’t want them to grow up too fast on you because you would miss these moments “, well i already miss the moments when they were babies and had nothing to say back to me:)

My everyday life is lived by these phrases, don’t do that! Stop it!  but you know what I cannot imagine my life without them.

With all these being said, are you a mother who experience these moments with your kids or just tell me how your day to day live works with your kids.

Leave a comment and let’s talk about it.

This is for us all the beautiful mums, and the wonderful dads who hold it down for their kids, we all do a great job and much love to us all.

Thanks!!!!!

Happy Sunday to all my friends and family. Love u all and appreciate all who take their time to read and comment on my blog. I decided to do this because I believe my life is an example to those who believe it is over when it has not even started. God is the author and finisher of all things. No matter your situation now, bear in mind it is not permanent, your change would come sooner than you think.

I believed and I conquered lots of obstacles and I believe there is more to conquer because for success to be attained you have to pass through the mud. Remember that when coming out of that situation, you would be washed so clean that your enemy would not recognize. This is my belief and I ask God to bless you all.

Love you all and happy Sunday from

Hubby and me.

The change that changed it all

 

As I said in my last blog, we did have a change and when this change came, our lives took an entire turn to a different course, even though sad but made us stronger.

When I was about 5 going to 6, I would remember vividly that my mum and dad had a store (provisional shop), and as teachers it was meant to supplement for them the other things they would not provide for us with their meager salary, as within 4 to 6 years their family has grown to a of 5 people (3 kids).This store was supposed to help us out and it did for a while until one day my mum came home and packed us all (Kids) out of our home without our dad and moved us into my auntie’s house.

As a child, I didn’t understand what was happening neither did my siblings as they were younger. Our minds were trying to understand the change we were going through, like, what could be making my mum pack her things and leave my dad behind. In my little mind, I thought we were going on vacation, visiting family members as this was a tradition of my family to visit family members during the holidays. My siblings and I, especially my brother because then my sister was about 2yrs old were thinking, well maybe we would go back to our lives and be a happy family again, but  1 day became 2days and 2days became 3years etc. and then it became apparent that we were not going back to our dad’s home. Something is wrong with our family, it is now broken, we don’t know why or what caused it but as we got older we started hearing things and we knew then that this was way bigger than our little minds could take.

I never heard my mum and dad argue at that time, and so this was all a big shock to us. Our mum is now a single mum, in her twenties, a teacher (Teacher’s certificate-TC) and four mouths to feed including a niece who lived with her during this period. Things changed drastically for us, my mum made sure we went to school and as an older child I went to a good enough primary school at that time (St Joseph’s Primary School). My brother went to a school around the area where we lived because my mum could not afford transportation for both of us, and my younger sister was sent to my late grandmother for a year in the village whilst she try to put her life together.

I can tell you this for sure that the break between my mum and dad was hard and it definitely made me the stronger woman I am today.  In my auntie’s home (My mum’s older sister), there were more than 30 people living in this house and when we came to live at their house, there was not a lot of space available for us, the only place available for us at that time was a one bedroom under the basement of the house (Krio-under sayla), which was where all the kitchen or other materials were kept. As kids we slept with other family members in the space where all the kitchen stuff were kept, my mum would spread clothes (Lappas) on the floor and she would sleep on a small bed that was enough for one in a little room next to ours. Our room was an access to other rooms and that makes it difficult sometimes as people were going in and out of the room, and we were also the first people to wake up because the kitchen utensils were needed for morning breakfast every day. We would wake up in the morning go to our mum’s room, get our school materials, shower and get ready for school. This happened for almost 4 or 5 years of our lives. It was a hard life during this period. We ate rice and pepper (Dry res en pepper),bulgur, (whole grain wheat), and as my mum was a teacher  she would sell things like things like cool aid (Ice), Fish ball (Fishball), Bulgur (Bulgur Kanya), corn flour (Kanya), etc to the kids she teaches to make ends meet. We came from having our own bedroom to now sleeping on the floor, because of this change.

It was so bad that one day during this period, I could remember vividly, my mum was dressing up to go out, she wore a dress that I thought in my little mind she has won so much, it was all faded and her shoes were all worn out, so I turned towards her and said “Mama please don’t wear this clothes, it’s too “white” (meaning too old). She looked at me and I could see the sadness in her eyes and she said “oh no don’t worry its fine, I will just have it starched and ironed, it would be new again.” She told me later on that it brought tears to her eyes, and as a kid I was able to see her sufferings even though I didn’t understand it at that time. I remember also going to a cousin’s birthday party and I had a plastic shoe (celetoe) on, all the kids were pointing at my shoes and laughing at me, I went to my mum as a kid and said “Mum they are laughing at my shoes” she replied and said to me the only way she knows how “Don’t worry about them, you forget about them ok” and trust me that made me feel better at that moment. The voice of my mum saying “don’t worry about them was a blessing” I held my head up high and did not allow these kids to spoil that moment even in my plastic shoeJ. I did not let them break me, but I still remember that day like it happened yesterday.

My mum got everything second hand for us(Or hand me downs) because that was what she could afford and I remember that as children we never once complained even when we saw other families living way better than we did. We ate what was given to us and we wore what our mum bought for us.

We would see our dad here and there every now and again and was a difficult period as every time we saw him, we would cry so hard when it was time to leave. Looking back now, I do wonder as an adult why my mum was the one who moved out of the house instead of the other way round. But you know this is just my thought. My mum is a strong black woman and she held it together travelling to the village to get materials she would sell just to make ends meet, and doing all she could to make sure that we do go to school and have clothes on our back. We appreciate her for all she has done for us.

She is one of my heroes and she is a strong black woman.

Today is the birthday of this special woman in my life, the strong black woman who held it down. Please help me wish her a happy birthday.

Thanks for reading.

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